In sitcoms from the fifties, married couples slept in single bed suites or double bed bedrooms. Some fifty years later this is no longer the norm, and most Melbourne couples happily share king and queen bedroom suites with their partners – but it seems that some are choosing separate bedrooms and beds by choice, and both parties are happy with the arrangement. While no statistics are available for Australia alone, America’s National Sleep Foundation claims as much as a fifth of all couples are choosing to sleep apart.
A ‘night divorce’ is when a couple chooses to sleep in separate bedroom suites because they cannot get the rest they need sharing a kind or queen sized bedroom. These couples have happy relationships and enjoy intimacy often. It’s just the actual sleeping that they prefer doing alone.
You will be hard pressed to find a couple that would continue with a night divorce when there are so many benefits to sharing a bed with a loved one. Spooning has been proven to lower the stress hormone cortisol and increase the release of feel-good love hormones like oxytocin. There are steps that can be taken by couples who wish to annul their night divorce, and much of it concerns one crucial component that is often overlooked – the actual bed frame.
It’s common knowledge that a good mattress should offer spinal support, individual coils (so that when one person moves the other does not feel the movement) as well as a host of other benefits. But what is less common knowledge is that even with the most expensive mattress in the world, you won’t sleep comfortably if you have the wrong frame.
Your bed’s underlying structure provides an important foundation for your mattress and by extension your sleep. Most people select a frame based on aesthetics alone when it is on sale or part of a set. This is the wrong choice to make, as the quality of a bed frame takes many individual factors into account.
Pick a bed frame that matches the mattress you are going to buy. Whether you are choosing a platform bed frame, metal bed frame or box spring bed frame your mattress need to be compatible. Most mattresses come with manufacturer recommendations of what frames they can and cannot be used with that will help you with this.
Your frame should offer multiple points of support and combine springs and slats to prevent the mattress from sagging at the edges as well as the centre. The legs of a frame should be stable and not shift easily. If the frame is too low, special risers can be purchased to create a more suitable height without compromising on stability and comfort.
Finally, bed accessories must be considered. Some frames are created to be used with certain headboards and footboards, and you should take this into account when purchasing an item out of a bedroom package as it might not offer good support if not used in conjunction with its set parts.
Like in a good relationship, you cannot get good sleep without a great foundation. Once you have a solid foundation, you will find that everything else seems to fall into place, and you might even end up sharing beds again!